Doctor's Note: TAM

Oct 3, 2011

How about I go all "I Love Lucy" and explain myself?  I'll even save you the torture of "War and Peace" and give you my own foul mouthed cliff notes version...ready?

My beloved Dodge Neon was laid to rest.  After 8 years of great mileage, road trips, and endless shopping excursions, Merlot (yes she had a name - and yes, I am aware it is wine, no intervention plz) died. On the street, with a car load of baked goods no less.  I took one for the team and "ate" a delightful breakfast croissant (code: butter, cheese, goodness), there is no "I" in team right?  Fast forward two days and I'm sitting at the dealership explaining to the salesperson I want a car payment that "will not tap into my shoe budget"...

Grad school has become a stress induced fiery hell. My professor has single handedly decided he has an empty chest cavity and refuses to change my grade (less than 5 points) to a "B", which is passing.  Tears, wine, fury, and wine later, I'm taking time off from grad school (even though I only have my capstone left) and appealing my grade with the dean.  I LOVE how you work your ass off, carry your textbook in your purse, AND have a tutor that you nearly drive to get a restraining order against you..its fun.

Food: perhaps the list of things I did NOT eat would be shorter.  Brussel sprouts...

Seven years, building a house together, joint bank account, monogrammed Christmas stockings, and a basement renovation later turns out we didn't have the same things in mind for our future. I won't get on my soapbox, but I will say this, the past year I've learned more about myself and what I want, people I allow in my circle, and outlook for my future and I credit a large part of the to Tracy. When I began boot camp I had NO idea what was ahead.  Fast forward and I'm in a great place in my life, and happier than I've been in a long time, which came from a deep look at my life, where I was, and if that was enough for me.  A dear friend forwarded me this quote awhile back that totally put me at peace.

"When you’re mad at the person, that’s not a good enough reason. It’s when you’re mad at yourself for dealing with the person that it’s time to move on."

So, I'm single for the first time since college, and I won't lie, I'm terrified. Partly because I haven't been on a date since Bush was in office, and the whole idea of dating again is both daunting and exhausting. "What do you wanna do, I don't care what do you wanna do" blah! Just be prepared for the ridiculousness that will be my love life, I'm sure it'll be comical...for you at least :) In addition to all that, I'm living alone (for the first time), in an apartment (for the first time) - and we all know I have a freakishly vivid imagination.  Add to that my intense obsession with "Criminal Minds" - let's just say I've invested in night lights AND leave my hall light on at night!  Thank God for Ringo, my gorgeous, albeit psychotic and uber energetic border collie mix made the move with me, cuz otherwise I'd be a bigger hot mess than I am now.

Morale of the story, my new casa is AMAZEBALLS, and I've been using all my energy to decorate it and workout (but more on that in my next post) so I haven't hit the "dress sweats" phase, yet.  I won't lie my boys Ben and Jerry are a staple (along with wine), but I gotta say, my glass is half full :)

I'll post meta results and level 1.1 of continuity ASAP.

So, am I excused???


Love & TAM,
-Marcia

2 comments:

  1. Wow - Marcia, I love you girl. I know this cannot have been easy for you and for me about to make my own move into an apartment - am dying to know how you get away with doing cardio and not having your neighbors what to kick your ass. Share please. And well done you. Tracy works her magic yet again.

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  2. Thx Love! Luckily I'm on the first floor, although I do have hardwood floors and sound like "running of the bulls". Sadly, I'm a slacker, so I haven't been consistent, so I haven't gotten the stink eye yet :) Hope this helps!

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